While children, especially as they get older, most certainly do "keep score" - of the game score and season standings, DeKalb AYSO does not publicly collect or post this information. The focus of the game is to have fun and learn about soccer. No prizes are awarded to the team with the most wins in the end. Because teams are balanced when they are put together, the games should technically be "fair".
On rare occasions, teams have gone for an entire season without winning - or sometimes without losing - a game. Players should be reminded that this is not a reflection on any one aspect of the sport or coach or team or player.
If the team is having a hard time winning games
- Focus not only on good sportsmanship but also on what they are getting from the experience - perseverance, dedication, supporting their teammates even when they're down. This is not always an easy thing for parents, let alone coaches or especially players, to do. Be mindful of that in dealings with the referees, coaches, other parents, and other players as well as your own. If children see you're ok with it, they are less likely to feel they've let you down, but if they hear someone being berated, they will feel shamed.
- Ask them if they tried their best, if they had fun.
- Remind them that they're playing as a part of a team.
- Remind goalies that the ball had to get through every player on their team before it got through them.
- If you have an issue with a coach or a referee, remember that they are all VOLUNTEERS. Discuss matters with them privately and proactively, offer to lend a hand as opposed to a harsh word. Step up and coach or ref.
- Tell them how proud you are of them.
If the team is having an extremely successful season
- Show good sportsmanship in their wins.
- Commend them on their efforts.
- Be wary of their becoming too "cocky" and getting comfortable.
- Encourage them to challenge themselves, to further develop their skills by doing extra passes, shooting with their non-dominant foot, etc.
- Tell them how proud you are of them.